Friday, June 16, 2006

Encounter with an idiot

One of the perks of taking public transport is the opportunity to getting close to the scum-eaters of the local society.

On my way back from work today, the tram's seats were about a third occupied, so there were plenty of spaces. I sat at an empty row’s aisle seat, and promptly got lost in thought about the air-temperature moderating effect of rainfall. In the window seat across the aisle was a Japanese-looking lady staring absently into the murky blackness outside.

Some minutes into the journey, a man dressed in sports attire boarded the tram. With a hooded shirt, tracksuit and white running shoes, he emitted the aura of a chav.

He walked down the aisle, not to be given away in a marriage ceremony, but on the lookout for a seat. The Japanese-looking lady remained in deep thought; I was reading a message on my phone. When he reached our row, he reached to the seat next to the lady, and picked up the corner of the coat draped over half the seat, and folded it up back into her space without so much as an ‘excuse me’. That done, he sat himself on the aisle seat that he had forcibly cleared, while the row behind remained completely unoccupied.

The lady gave him at him with a look of annoyance, folded her jacket on her lap and returned to her thoughts. The chav leaned across the narrow aisle, tapped my on my shoulder to get my attention. He reeked of uselessness, a general sensation that this character probably exhibits antisocial behaviour. He also stank.

He was quite annoying; I ignored him. When it was impossible to do so, I gave him what I thought to be evil stares. He’d stare back with his version of evil stare.

Once he banged on a plastic partition sheet, and when I looked up he was gesturing with a finger pointing up/ outside or something. Strange language, definitely not HTML. I gave him the condescending stare again, and he returned with his gaze.

Near the city centre, he came to me and mumbled unintelligible. I inferred it to be along the lines of “since we don’t like each other, there’s a tram stop coming up.” He then waited at one of the doors.

“A voice from behind me, nearby, asked softly, “Are you all right?” It had a diluted Indian accent.
“Yes, I’m fine. Thanks.”
“Was he trying to be a jackass?”
“Oh, very much so. You meet all sorts of characters on public transport.”
“You shouldn’t have taken his shit. Could ask him to go away or something. I’d have beaten him up if I knew he was bugging you earlier.”
“Yeah, that’s true.”

Annoying chav alighted at the next stop and disappeared into the murkiness of night time Melbourne.

That little encounter had me thinking, if I had to shed that non-confrontational approach and run a tosser into the ground, will I be able to do it?

When I arrived at my stop, I turned around and thanked the man behind man for his concern. He and his female companion were getting off at the same stop. It was the first time I took a close look at them, and I would guess they hail from the northern regions of the Indian subcontinent, being fairer in complexion and all.

I think Yvy would find that man quite fetching. Not that I’m a connoisseur of men, Indian or otherwise. The girl was quite pretty though.

Anyway, he had a more confrontational approach and recommended that no one should tolerate this kind of shit form anyone.
“Beat him up if he doesn’t stop [after you tell him off]; the cops would understand.”

That little discussion had me rethinking my strategy of general non-confrontation. In more populated locations, I could probably push that non-confrontationist back a little. But in quiet places, it’s best to play it safe. After all, if you don’t run a tosser into the ground, you run the risk of getting ploughed into the ground, with no one around to help.

On the matter of running tossers into the ground, I should polish up that back thrust of mine in case non-confrontation fails. No point having a one-shot-kill weapon when that one shot misses.

Yes, the momentum transfer of a back thrust is that fantastic. You get linear and angular momentum all dissipated in the impact- fantastic stuff.

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Blogger Dr. Tan said...

Speaking of which, I have a competition coming up in July. Invitation from somebody in Sunway. Must work on my thrust and swings already

2:21 am, June 16, 2006  
Blogger 小李飞刀 said...

Hmm... I think its a lose-lose situation if you initiate a fight with the tosser. What can you hope to gain. No need to get so worked up right..not like he tried to rob you or anything.

Unless of course you're looking for combat experience... then go for it.

3:09 am, June 16, 2006  
Blogger Minny said...

Chavs are extremely common and annoying in the UK. They usually hang out in groups and engage in all sorts of anti-social behaviour. Furthermore, the "High Council of Chav-dom" deems that they must end every 2nd sentence with the word "innit?" ;)

eg. Aw marn, thass wik-kid marn, innit?

3:32 am, June 16, 2006  
Blogger sonia said...

lol.. Even before chavs can do anything, by saying 'innit' that many times is also quite annoying. =P

Anyways, I was thinking why that fella go tap ur shoulder. What does he want? Yuen lai he wants to "cari pasal". lol... I think I'd just give him a stare and then just ignore him & look away.

Btw, fighting (or confronting - whichever word u prefer, haha) in fronta many ppl will not necessarily mean u get support from others. Nowadays many ppl just care for themselves edi. They might just run away if they see anything bad happens near them =P

6:01 am, June 16, 2006  
Blogger David said...


Think situation like this, it's very very subjective depending on each person. Chav and people who look for trouble for fun, they deserve to DIE! Esp in a foreign country when people will feel bullied, they will get angrier faster. For me, if i know i will keep blaming myself for not reacting for days afterwards, i will definitely at least retaliate in some ways. Whether verbal abuse or whatever. For me, sometimes not retaliating is worse than dying!Be safe and a pepper spray is useful also.

8:07 am, June 16, 2006  
Blogger Dr. Tan said...

Oh I just realised that 'back thrust' sounds wrong. Its like a 'belakang mari' like that. Do change over to Haloscan. Its easier. No word verification needed

12:16 pm, June 16, 2006  
Anonymous pamela said...

glad he didnt do more than annoy u!

usually i just stare out the window n pray that he thinks i dont understand english (so he wont come n kacau me)

there was once dis guy sat right next to me n shook my hand n talked to me for 2 blocks. his eyeballs kept rolling back into his head n i was so scared he was gonna die/faint right next to me. i got home n washed my hands with LOTS of soap.

u take care =P

3:19 pm, June 16, 2006  
Blogger Lao Chen said...

That should be interesting...
Now that you mention it, it does sound bad. Advice noted, but not nessecarily put into action.

Yuan Harng:
I agree, getting into a brawl is a silly risk.

Yeah, i've heard stories... Suck, innit?

Yes, have to keep that in mind too.

Yes, those idiots should die a miserable death. Preferably in an ugly accident involving trams or tubes.

Some people really stink bad. Im scared of those characters.

5:15 pm, June 16, 2006  
Anonymous yvy said...

you thot that i would have liked him?? haiya, y didnt take pix? i could at last feast my eyes right? ;)

5:26 pm, June 16, 2006  
Blogger cyber-red said...

wahlao interesting read.. you write well

not only chavs ler how about those evil-unkles-who-give-out-lewd-stares?

I swear i could go bitch-slap them

8:17 pm, June 16, 2006  
Blogger Lao Chen said...

Sorry for the disappointment, I did not have my camera with me. Well you can imagine...

Next time ok? If i happen to look at the guys. I usually look at the cars, i hope you understand. :-p

Oooh, a compliment coming from someone who writes to earn a living.
*head expands*

I rarely have issues with hamsap uncles, seeing that I'm a male and all (in case this pink background misled you).

But once a gay man winked at me. Asshole.
It was disturbing. I ignored him and went back to my ice cream.

The gelato was brilliant. Made ignoring him much easier.

9:07 pm, June 16, 2006  
Blogger cyber-red said...

"went back to my ice-cream" LOLLLLLLL

mister.. i write tabloid news if u need to know.. that's not even serious writing lol

12:29 am, June 17, 2006  
Blogger 小李飞刀 said...

Haha.. at least not as bad as my encounter.

Got this gay dude tfk right in front of me at Sri Siam basketball court. I ignored him and went back to shooting hoops.

1:00 am, June 17, 2006  
Anonymous yvy said...

hahaha!! totally understandable but u could have at least unlease ur talent for description right? tell me what he looked like so that my mind can run wild. ;P

9:49 am, June 17, 2006  
Blogger Lao Chen said...

Haha, somehow, tabloid has a degratory ring to it. Oh well...

Yuan Harng:
Oh yes i've heard of the Sri Siam Wanker several times already. Maybe its all from the same source, who knows. I'll talk about the LRT TFKer next time...

Heh... the only thing i can think of at the moment is that his jawline looked like David Couthard's, but a tad narrower. Beyond that, i cant imagine how to describe...2 eyes, 2 ears, 5 tentacles. The usual la.

12:38 pm, June 17, 2006  
Blogger Dr. Tan said...

Yes do go Haloscan. Its really easy. And our cookies are saved so we don't have to key in this that everything.

Remember to add in the Korean nigger who was looking for a handjb as well.


11:21 pm, June 17, 2006  

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